The longest post

This whole week, it seemed that seconds were like minutes, minutes hours, and hours like damn long days. Everything seemed to be in slow motion starting Monday morining. I was in such a bad mood Monday…like a really bad mood. I didn’t know where to complain so twittered what I felt (lol). Sometimes technology helps in such a big way. Anyways, I was just so pissed off at everybody for no specific reason. My body needed to get pissed! lol! So Tuesday morning I was starting my real week, but like usual I had to line up and do all types of works and prepare some papers in public offices, which really is annoying and irritating. They are so slow and useless and totally inefficient. Like seriously, they make u line up for several hours at a specific door just to tell u to go another door, where again u line up. GRrrrr. And, something that was marked that day I met up with one of Al Pacino’s and it’s nice to hear about him and listen to his stories. “Intelligent, integre, ambitieux, extraordinaire, serviable homme etait ton pere” was the sentence he repeated constantly. Wednesday, there’s hope…hope encourages u to finish up the week because the day after tomoroow it’s the weekend. I am motviated at work, do all types of stuff, smiling, then chilling and listening to good music while trying to learn cinema 4d, then go to evening classes with a big smile on the face ready to cheer up my classmate Mirana. As we were laughing around (but listening to the teacher) we got in big shit. Like the teacher was so pissed off that I never took notes in the class and all. He was a little pissed off at me until I repeated word by word of what he said (and at the end I wanted to add “Now what biiiatch?!!!”, but I didn’t loooool). Thursday, I’m totally broke so had to go find a guy that owed me cash. Got the cash, but still broke cause I had to give the cash to somebody else after… Friday, had an appointment with somebody that was quite important, but the mo’fo called to postpone the appointment…was pissed. Didn’t have much work, so continued wuth Cinema4d and had just good fun learning how to insert lights on my first 3d creation. 5 p.m. the phone starts to ring for the evening plan. I wasn’t ready to go out, UNTIL my bro tells me that the “STALKER” will come over hang around at home with some of my bro’s friends this evening so HAD to find the plan to escape…lol. While thinking about what to do for the evening plan, I get a text from a friend telling me to check on te latet flickr uploads whenever I got time. Directly, opened up flickr and guess what I see? Pics of my photo shoots!! Magnificently beautiful. I’m not beautiful, but the pic is just fabulous! It was real, it was me, it was colorful, I mean f$%k it was ME, the Princess V. I was amazed, stunned, hypnotized. It made my day! If directly changed my facebook profile pic…which I think will be permanent! lol! Went to evening classes and went on the web to facebook and chat with friends. I then went home to get ready and went out and had fun. Yes, I did have fun singing and dancing and laughing and staring at nightclub horny biaaatchs (wit my girl Nat) all nite. Oh yeah, something kinda of weird happened to that evening at the niteclub, but prefer not mentionning it Saturday morning 7:30, was supposed to be at school, but couldn’t wake up. I was DEAD. I had a stomach problem, I was suffering, I was totally hangover. For once, I skipped school. I had to, I couldn’t bare stay on a chair and listen to an old man bullsh%t for 5 hours on economics and all. Nope, unable to. So, stayed home and tried to sleep for several hours until my phone rings “Hello, it’s me…don’t forget u promised me to come and see my concert today hein”. I was like f%^k I hate promises. Went to the “concert” to hear all types of Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, Celine Dion stuff…couldn’t handle it was falling asleep (SORRY JOSE : mais t’as une voix sublime toi et Lalaina ka!). Now, I’m home and I’m lying on my bed, listening to my playlist and at this moment (right now) a Keri Hilson song is on…the one that just f^&king knocks me down…

Back to Black

I slept in Mom’s room today and at 3 a.m. she started panicing and all and started lighting the lights and I was like “what the hell are you doing?” She was like “There’s a huge black moth flying on top of you!!!”. I was like, ok… didn’t care and she chased it away and still went back to sleep.

In the Malagasy culture, they/we believe that black moths in a house is a symbol of death and it is believed that death will soon come. It starts to freak me out…

Clic Clic Boom

Yesturday I had the opportunity to do some photo shoots with two REAL photographs. Real, lol, as if i was trying to say that some photographers ain’t real. whatever, I am not supposed to talk about this because I don’t know a thing about Nikons or Canons, all I know is that they are fucking expensive so I ain’t got one. Loooool!

Ok, but as I said, I had some shoots yesturday and it was just something that I have always wanted…it was one of those little things in life that I have dreamt of doing since young age : acting like a star and all… hahahaha! Changing clothes and put some makeup and pretend u’re just something extraordinary when u pose even if it’s not the case.  Lol. Nobody in the room could imagine the joy I had, the excitement I had to pose and see the flashes flash. 

Yesturday while the photographers were directing me I was just ontop of a lil cloud. Like those clouds u wish u could stay on for quite a while. I mean, I was happy. I didn’t need much to be happy. I was in my DELIRIUM and for that , even if on the pics I look ugly and whatever, I don’t really care because while taking those pics I was happy.

So, thanks to two great delirious photographs, a girlfriend, the tester, and the famous lighter (something they use to get the point or something like that) for contributing in making a little dream of mine come true. Stay real <3

Favorite Quote

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary – STEVE JOBS  

Votre temps est limité, ne le gaspillons pas a vivre la vie d’autrui. Ne vous laissez pas piéger par le dogme – qui vit avec les résultats des pensées des autres. Ne laissez pas le bruit des opinions des autres noyer votre voix intérieure. Et le plus important, avoir le courage de suivre votre cœur et votre intuition. Eux,  ils savent déjà ce que vous voulez réellement devenir. Tout le reste est secondaire. – STEVE JOBS

The I-hate-list

There used to be 14 things I used to hate in life but I added a new one …so there’s now 15.

1. I hate beans and all those “kabary, voanjobory, tsaramaso”

2. I hate cars manufactured in 1993, there was a whole design-bugg.

3. I hate french music especially french rap and those songs where they actually don’t sing but talk.

4. I hate it when my boyfriend calls me “cherie” – it sounds soooo fake. A princess ain’t liking that “cherie” thang.

5. I hate politics and the whole DJ system (I’m from Madagascar, so you might know what I mean)

6. I hate hearing somebody talk sh%t about my mom, sibs, and bestfriends.

7. I hate receiving flowers for Valentines Day or birthday or whatever – it reminds me of death.

8. I hate it when I starting falling for a mo’fo that already has a girlfriend.

9. I hate taking the bus when it’s too hot – stinking armpits sticking to my shoulder…(they barely wear deodorant in Tana, but they heavily sweat)

10. I hate listening to people talking in a very complicated manner and complicated words when all they want to say is “I don’t care”

11. I hate seeing red and pink together, or brown and purple. It gives me nausea…this is serious.

12. I hate it when they say “REEEAAAALLLY?? You don’t like Mahaleo?! I don’t believe yooou!” – Like f&$k I just don’t like it…what now?

13. I hated/still hate running! You will NEVER see me running after a ball or jogging ! Hell na!!

14. I hate extended family reunions – I don’t really have the “family” thing in me… my bad!

and the latest update of my “hate-list” is :

15. I hate stalkers- especially those who wait at my gate to see me come home. Like f&*k that’s what happened to me last night! Get a life – you know who u are.

There are now 15 things I hate about life … but there are SO many things about life that I just love. I know that if one of these days I’m no longer gonna be there, I will extremely miss life. Maybe heaven might be just too boring for me… ;P

11:06 – 11:25 p.m.

I am so pissed off that I got school on Saturdays. Damn, it’s cray, every evening til 8:00 pm and ON saturdays!!! It was supposed to be every other saturday but I don’t know why the hell they decided to add some IFC/WB business edge courses! Grrr…and plus can’t skip class for this next month or two because I will not be delivered a certificate (which I do need for my room xaxaxa). I think Mom’s wishes for me to stay home on Friday nights finally came true. lol… It’s just weird… I came back from a friend’s mom’s funerals and I would have loved to go out, hang out with some friends, and laugh…but I am finally too tierd for that. Still wondering what I’m going to do for tomorrow. Yes, I miss so many people with who I automatically would meet up on Saturdays. I miss some friends of mine, the ones that used to call me Saturday morning to go shopping with for hours at Chinatown. I miss those phone calls and the conversations that start with “Wssssup” “Yin” or “Aiza e” … I miss homies that now are grownups…the one’s we call adults. 

Yeah, it’s 11:14 p.m. and I am at home and still can’t sleep. My mind is starting to think…and that’s what I hate most. Thinking. I’ve been on facebook looking at the lates newsfeed but finally after five status updates I was like “F*%k, I don’t care”… If only there was the “Don’t care” option, u know like the “I Like” ones on facebook! Loool! I shouldn’t be talking sh*t sbout facebook because I a glad that Mark actually invented facebook : sharing each other’s bullsh*t to entertain desperately boring days like mine.

It’s 11:21 pm and  just opened Skype and there’s 34 connected homies, 32 on msn, and 41 on facebook and I still feel lonely because I AM lonely. Ndrrrriiiiii (pitiful in malagasy). It’s funny I got like a hundred friends online and at least two dozens of chat tabs all saying “Salut” “Coucou” and ain’t replying. Sorry, it’s just for tonite… I am not in the mood of talking to ANYBODY.

Ok, back to my thinking…so I really don’t know what to do with my life. STOP. The thinking is done. Goodnite. 11:25 p.m.

I did it

I am just so happy because I was able to keep a promise. I am happy because whatever haunted me since may 2009 will haunt me no more. I am happy because I am lighter.  I am just sooo happy because I now know I can go on. I am happy because they trusted me. Al Pacino’s lil’ girl is happy.

Limits of the Ordinary Life

I’ve been at work stuck on my chair in a pissy mood loudly listening to the album “Back to Black” with my headphones since 7:30 a.m. !  This girl is amazing…stunning…everything but ordinary! It’s remarkable and astounding seeing this 40′s-trash-junkie on live : A.W.E.S.O.M.E. 

Other than her incredible voice, she got sooo much more than Beyonce, Shakira, or I don’t know who. I mean, she’s real. She may be the celebrity that gets locked up for dealing some drugs or by assaulting men, the one that gets totally high on stage while singing “Tears Dry on Their Own*” , and might be the one that has the trashiest pics published/uploaded on press/Internet BUT all that ain’t matter because she is THE Amy Winehouse and she doesn’t give a f%^k of who-what-how-or why of those ordinary people in this ordinary life….

* a song dedicated to one of my close homies

G.a.m.e

Life is a game, there are so many levels in life you have to achieve in a very short time. What happens if we can’t achieve Level 2 of World 3? And what happens if we were able to insert cheats like in games to get more benefits would we be judged? What happens if we just finish Level 1 of World 1 and it’s already Game Over, are you allowed to restart and replay as many times as we want? Are we allowed to fail some levels in life? How long can we pause the game?

…My life’s a game and I’m very close to level 4 but I am lost and I was planning to type the cheats but unfortunately I lost the piece of paper I wrote ‘em on. I don’t know if ima press the RESTART button and go back to level 1 and have the courage to replay the whole thing back again…or if I should just continue with my last life and try real hard to fight and accomplish level 4 in the hope of finishing the level or finding a 1-up.

I know you might not even understand WTH i’m talking about…but it’s ok because this is MY blog –  NOT yours.

Reborn

Was playing Super Mario Bros on the Nintendo DS this morning in the car on the road to work…wow…so many memories came back. I remember when Dad came back from France and brought me this small green Nintendo. I don’t remember the name of it, but I just remember that I had this small Nintendo with the smallest screen and the only game I had inside was Mario and it was black and white and extremely pixelized! lol. Well…while I was playing Mario in the car with the DS, I was back to my childhood. Excited to see the end of each world (even if it’s always the same : Bowser capturing the Princess and bringing her to the next level) and proudly smiling after each level is done! I was soooo into my game that when I got burnt by the magna and the lava I screamed! Mom just looked at me as if I was a pitiful-immature-old-lady-kid. Lol! Mario is my supahero…and now that I think about it…Mario strongly influenced my life. I started stuffing myself up with junky food to become as fat as him, my favorite color is red and  I got alot of hope in life like Mario (with the “?” blocks – sometimes it’s a 1up, sometimes it cash, sometimes its a mushroom or a supapowa and sometimes there’s … nothing). Mario helped me to be patient : I was sooooooooo patient that I was able to stay infront of my Nintendo to  try to finish 01 (ONE) damn f$%king level for two days in a row…and still never passed it! Still remember when my older borther would be so pissed off because it took me several hours to be “GAME OVER” when it would take him exactly five minutes to lose all his five lives! loool! Even the music, (wow) what a divine creation! Ok…stop stop…gotta go back to work…